Friendship Breakups: Let’s normalize it.

Let’s face it, friendship breakups happen and they are normal to experience. Additionally, they can feel harder to go through than romantic relationship break ups, especially when there is history. Here are a few things to consider when going through a break up with a best friend that you always imagined to be around forever.

Talk about it with a loved one: Going through a break up with a close friend can lead to anxiety and depression-like symptoms, especially isolation and feelings of wanting to withdraw. Speak to a loved one that will be able to provide you with space to just be with the emotions you are feeling without needing to fix or change. Can you ask this loved one for space to just listen to you express your emotional experience?

Remember that the stages of grief (Denial/Relief, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance) are necessary to feel and not linear: Grief comes and goes in waves and stages. Remember that there is no timeline as to when you need to be “over it.” Recognize that it is normal and natural for emotions to come and go, for anger to replace sadness, sadness to replace relief, and vice versa.

Take care of yourself: Gentleness, gentleness, gentleness. Be gentle with yourself. Pay attention to your body and take inventory each day on what your body or mind may need, whether that’s movement/exercise, a good meal, or time spent connecting with a friend.

Find meaning: Take some time to find solutions and look back on things you would do differently in your current friendships once you have felt and processed the stages of grief. It is difficult to “problem solve” and reflect back and take accountability when feeling big emotions or experiencing grief, so be patient and set intentional time to do so once you are feeling clear headed and grounded again.

Blog by Lauren Wein, MA
Photo by Cheng Shi Song via Pexels